Argentine Tango is celebrated for its beauty, its embrace, and its emotional depth. Yet behind the elegance, there exists an uncomfortable truth: social dance communities, like society itself, are not immune to harassment, manipulation, and abuse. Unfortunately, silence perpetuates harm, creating unsafe environments where predators thrive and survivors are left questioning themselves.

The Invisible Threat: Harassment in Dance Spaces

Harassment is far too common in social dance communities, including Minnesota. From predatory behavior on the dance floor to inappropriate advances in rehearsal spaces, these behaviors are alarmingly persistent. Too often, dancers believe that predators couldn’t exist in their beloved circles, claiming, “That doesn’t happen here.”

But it does.

I know because it has happened to my friends, my loved ones, and me. Despite my awareness and experience, I’ve often questioned myself: Is it me? Am I doing something wrong? The truth is, there’s nothing a person can do to control how a predator perceives them. Abusers seek vulnerability and exploit it, no matter how experienced or confident the target may be.

The issue isn’t the individual—it’s the culture of silence that allows these behaviors to persist.

SOURCE : https://www.nsvrc.org/resource/facts-behind-metoo-movement-national-study-sexual-harassment-and-assault

Why Silence Enables Harm

Predators exploit the trusting nature of dance communities, thriving in environments where:

• People are pressured to stay quiet to “avoid drama.”
• Influential dancers are excused for inappropriate behavior.
• Organizers lack clear procedures to address misconduct.

I’ve seen respected figures dismiss individuals’ concerns with statements like:

“I didn’t see it, so it didn’t happen.”

“That’s just how they are.”

“You’re overreacting.”

These dismissals embolden predators and discourage survivors from speaking up. For many, the discomfort becomes too much, and they leave the community altogether.

A Personal Reflection: When Boundaries are Misunderstood

As a dance coach, I’ve experienced boundary violations firsthand. Some people mistake my warmth and friendliness as something more. While I strive to create a positive learning environment, I’m deeply aware—sometimes to the point of paranoia—of the risks of crossing someone’s boundaries.

Despite this, I know I can’t retreat under a rock or simply quit my career. Silence and avoidance won’t fix the problem; accountability and awareness will.

The Weight of Survivor-hood

I, too, have been seriously victimized by hobbyists, professional dancers, and musicians who are still active and working today. While Minnesota law protects my right to name these individuals, those protections vary across regions, and internationally they are even less reliable. By the time I fully understood the manipulation, “casting couches,” and pressure to “take one for the team” I endured, the statute of limitations had passed.

These experiences weren’t my fault—but they are still mine to carry.

Why Some “Good People” Still Cross Boundaries

Boundary violators are often familiar faces—friends, respected dancers, or instructors. Common missteps include:

• Unsolicited Teaching: Correcting a partner mid-dance without consent is belittling and invasive.
• Pressure Tactics: Manipulating someone to “owe” a dance creates a harmful power imbalance.
• Misunderstanding Intimacy: Tango’s embrace is deeply personal, but mistaking it for something sexual crosses boundaries and creates discomfort.

What To Do?

Acknowledge the Problem: Harassment happens everywhere—even in Minnesota’s dance scene. Denying it only perpetuates harm.

Promote Healthy Boundaries: Dancers must be empowered to say “no” to unwanted advances or instruction. Fina a way to call Experienced dancers “in” when they are confused about their behaviors. A Yellow card like in soccer, perhaps?

Empower Bystanders: Organizers must foster a culture where concerns are taken seriously.

Create Clear Reporting Procedures: Establish visible contacts at events, document investigation steps, and follow up with individuals to ensure safety and accountability.

Embrace Difficult Conversations: Building safer spaces requires discomfort. Conversations about power dynamics, boundaries, and equity must become part of the community dialogue. Silence enables predators—dialogue empowers survivors and allies. CALL EVERYONE IN!

Solutions for Positive Change

• Encourage dancers to reflect on their actions: Am I offering help, or asserting control?
• Normalize clear, direct communication about boundaries.
• Emphasize that “good intentions” don’t excuse harmful behavior—accountability builds trust.

Resources for Support in Minnesota and the U.S.

If you or someone you know has experienced harassment or boundary violations, these resources can help:

• Minnesota Coalition Against Sexual Assault (MNCASA)
  www.mncasa.org | (651) 209-9993
• Cornerstone Advocacy Services
  www.cornerstonemn.org | (952) 884-0376 (24-hour helpline)
• National Sexual Assault Hotline (RAINN)
  www.rainn.org | 1-800-656-HOPE (4673)
• The National Domestic Violence Hotline
  www.thehotline.org | 1-800-799-SAFE (7233)
• OutFront Minnesota (For LGBTQ+ individuals)
  www.outfront.org | (612) 822-0127

We can create safer, stronger, and more inclusive tango and social dance communities where dancers can embrace the joy of movement without fear. . . . If we see it as Valuable.